crying croissants

I have been married about a month. There are a lot of emotions that go into marriage. I bake because I feel like I am telling people how much I care for them; that I want them to feel good. I bake because I like to see people enjoy the food and be tempted to break diets because of how good it tastes. I bake for my husband because I love him and I want him to feel loved. Baking is an act that involves all of the senses. You enjoy the texture, the smell, the sight, and especially the taste. I love the sounds associated with baking; pyrex dishes being clanked with spoons, mixers going while ovens are warming. I want those sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and textures all to be connected with my love (it's ok if you're nausiated by this point).

I made croissants last week after going on a backpacking adventure with my husband. We went on an 8 hr (roundtrip) hike that involved an incredibley steep 1.5 mile stretch right at the end. It was hot and steamy, my thighs felt like they were going to give out, and we were being eaten alive by bugs. We arrived at the top of the mountain to find a gorgeous lake with steep cliffs on three sides. After finding a camping spot we pitched our tent and dived inside to avoid the swarm of mosquitoes and skin licking flies. We spent the rest of the evening and morning in our little tent avoiding bugs, playing cards games, napping and heating up the water for a horrible freeze dried package of Pad Thai with two lighters. Needless to say, when we got home the next day we were starving and exhausted.

I wanted to bake something for us to enjoy for breakfast for the following week. We were short on time and I had started the dough for croissants last week and it was about to go bad. I decided to make criossants. Croissants are a very tricky thing to make, and this was not the right time to do it. Our apartment has no A/C and the temperature was over 80 inside. I was tired and short tempered, and felt pressured to make a baked good that would compensate for the crappy emotions I was feeling and would make my husband feel loved. Bake this recipe with caution;

Recipe borrowed in part by Leslie Mackie's Macrina Bakery & Cafe Cookbook

Ingredients:
1 1/2 c whole milk
1 1/2 tbspn dried yeast
3 tbspn granulated sugar
2 tbspn vanilla extract
1 1/2 tspn salt
3 cups, 3 tbspns, and a bazillion more cups flour
3 sticks chilled, rechilled and chilled again butter
1 crappy rolling pin
2hrs impatience
1 confused husband

Warm milk to yeast cultivating temp (v. warm bathwater temp), and sprinkle in yeast, sugar and vanilla. Whisk. Let sit for 5 minutes until yeast blooms.

Combine 3 c flour and salt in a medium bowl. Add milk/yeast mixture, and stir. Don't over mix this dough. Cover dough and place in fridge for 8 hrs-one week.

Cut butter into ~12 pieces, and combine with 3 tbspn flour in a mixer. Mix until smooth. With a spatula remove the butter and place on a floured surface. Form the butter into a 6" square, flour top and bottom. Attempt to wrap the butter square with plastic wrap and place in freezer. Expect to begin feeling frustration at this point.

Once butter square and dough are the same temp, roll out dough into a 7" square on to floured surface. Pull the corners about 4" away from the center and place the butter square in the center. Bring the corners over the top of the butter and cinch the corners together so it looks like a squarish lump of dough. Sprinkle more flour on to the counter, the dough and on your crappy rolling pin and begin the impossible task of rolling the dough into a 12"x 20" rectangle.

Give up and settle for something close to these dimensions. Then begins the bidissing book fold process. These folds will make you cry with frustration, but hang in there. It won't look perfect, but as long as you keep folding the dough, it will give the effect of a flaky croissant.

With the longer side facing you, fold both ends in towards the center so they meet. Then fold the left side on top of the right side (the original center of the dough will now be the 'hinge' of the book). Lift the folded mass that looks more like a subway roll than a book onto a lined baking sheet and place it in the freezer. You will probably only be a little flustered at this point.

In 20 minutes you will begin this process again starting with rolling the dough out into a 12"x 20" rectangle. The dough will break and butter will seap and ooze out. Attempting to pinch the dough together will only tear it more so use your bazillion cups of flour in reserve at this point to dry up those butter spots. After you have completed the bidissing book fold so that it looks worse than the last time, put the dough on the lined baking sheet again, throw it in the freezer and slam the door. Run upstairs and throw yourself on the bed dramatically. After waiting 10 minutes, ask your husband what he is doing and why he isn't making you feel better.

After 20 minutes has passed, pull the dough out of the fridge and do the whole process again. You will do this two more times for a total of four sets of book folds, the last one ending with you slamming the freezer door shut and crying into your elbow.

This dough can be rolled out, cut into triangles and rolled up into croissants. Or you can make them into "Morning Rolls" by cutting the dough in half, rolling the dough out (~10"x 20"), spreading a sugar mixture (1 1/2 cup sugar and 1 1/2 tbspn vanilla extract) on the surface of the dough, and then rolling it lengthwise into a log and cutting into six short rolls. Do this again with the other half of the dough. Let sit at room temp (or in fridge if your room is over 80 degrees) for 1 hr.

Place the twelve rolls in a muffin pan and bake in 385 degree oven for ~45 min until golden brown. Remove rolls from pan before they cool completely or else the sugar will harden and the rolls will stick to the pan.

Enjoy!